How to cope with parenting burnout
By Mercedes Oromendia, our Chief Clinical Officer
Parents, have you ever felt like you’re one load of laundry or a packed lunchbox away from reaching your breaking point? Like if you get asked one more question or one more sibling fight breaks out, you might just LOSE it?
You might be experiencing parenting burnout. Parenting burnout is overwhelming exhaustion related to your role as a parent that can cause feelings of shame, guilt, and resentment. We all know raising kids takes a great amount of emotional and physical energy. And if you’re not prioritizing your mental health or taking the time to do the things that re-energize you, you will quickly feel drained.
We’ve all probably experienced burnout at one point and let me tell you it is NOT fun. It feels as though you’ve ran out of gas in your tank and that there’s no gas station in sight. You might do what you can to just scrape by day in and day out. But, then you experience so much guilt because you’re not fully present for your kids.
You are not alone in feeling like this. It doesn’t mean that you are a failure or that there is something wrong with you. It simply is a sign that something needs to CHANGE.
Signs you may be experiencing parenting burnout 🔥
The first step to making a change is realizing that a change needs to happen. Here are some signs that you may be feeling burned out:
Intense physical and mental exhaustion
Loss of motivation and interest in activities you used to enjoy
Trouble sleeping or sleep disorders
Headaches or muscle aches
Irritability and frustration
Isolation or avoidance of others
Emotional detachment or disconnect from your child
Thoughts of self-harm or suicide
How to cope with parenting burnout
🗣 Talk about it. One of the first things you can (and should) do if you’re feeling burnt out is to speak with your spouse, co-parent, loved one, or partner. Be honest about how you’re feeling and what you’re dealing with. You could also talk about it with a therapist to help you understand what type of support you need.
👐 Seek support. This could be in the form of joining a parenting or support group or calling a friend or family member. Build that network that you could lean on when things get especially difficult.
🧘♂️ Practice self-care. It’s important that you try to practice self-care every day. That might sound like a lot, but it could be as simple as taking 2 minutes to do a breathing exercise or journaling every morning. Try to do something that is re-energizing for you so that you have enough energy to be fully present for your kids.
💆♀️ Be patient with yourself. This might be the most challenging task because we are our own toughest critics. Parenting is one of the most difficult jobs on Earth. Allow yourself to feel your feelings. You do not have to face everything alone or be a super mom or dad. Remember that you’re a human.
😴 Get enough rest. Getting good sleep is crucial to your mental health. If you’re unable to get a good night’s rest due to a newborn, try to sneak in power naps throughout the day. You could also rest by having a cup of coffee or tea or just being still and watching cartoons with your kids.