Back-to-School Parent FAQ
Parents shared their biggest worries and “how do I…?” moments with us.
We’ve gathered those questions here with quick, practical tips to help make the transition back to school a little smoother for the whole family.
📚 Organization & routines
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Two weeks before school, shift bedtime and wake-up time earlier by 10–15 minutes every few nights. Add daytime structure like regular meals and outdoor play to make bedtime easier. If the gradual approach doesn’t work, know that the first few days of school will reset them naturally. Grace is key. Adjustment is normal!
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Habits are your best tool here! Set a 5-minute after-school routine: unpack the backpack together, sort papers into clearly labeled folders or bins, and keep a spot for “papers for parents” in plain sight. Color coding (folders, sticky notes, highlighters) works well for visual learners.
Before bed, try another 5-minute routine for getting papers back into the backpack, so everything is ready in the morning. Stick to the same time each day—consistency turns it into an automatic habit.
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Create “routine zones” away from toys. Cover or store toys during transition times, and give each child a small job (“You’re in charge of shoes,” “You check the calendar”). Use countdowns or timers so they know what’s coming next, and celebrate once routines are done—small rewards or extra playtime motivate better than repeated reminders.
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Be honest about your family’s limits. Choose activities that match your family values and your child’s interests. Reflect and ask yourself if there are external factors pressuring you and your family to be involved in so many activities (like keeping up with the kids next door, for example).
Don’t be afraid to scale back! Quality time and rest matter, too. Use carpools, share drop-offs, and lean on your community for help.
❤️ Feeling connected with your kids
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Acknowledge your feelings; missing them is normal. Plan small connection rituals for when they’re home: an after-school snack together, a walk, or a nightly check-in. These moments help meet your connection needs and give them a sense of security, too.
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Use open-ended questions like “What was your favorite part of the day? How about the worst?”
Get to know who their friends and teachers are by name, take an interest in their interests; ask specific questions about their friends and teachers
Model sharing about your day. Kids naturally learn a lot from the behaviors we model for them, and this makes it feel more like a conversation than an interrogation.
When they respond, resist the urge to correct in the moment; take on a nonjudgmental stance so you keep them wanting to communicate. If there is an issue that needs to be corrected or addressed, wait until later or bring it up in a general sense during a family meeting or discussion.
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You don’t need hours of one-on-one time, just consistent, intentional moments. Try:
Micro moments: 5–10 minutes of undivided attention, like reading together or chatting during a car ride.
Everyday connection: Turn chores or errands into quick catch-up time.
Name what you notice: Point out specific things they’ve done well or kindly.
Small roles: Rotate who chooses dinner, picks the family game, or is “morning captain.”
It’s the steady, genuine check-ins that let each child know: “I see you, and you matter.”
👯 Friendships & social skills
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Normalize that making friends takes time. Role-play simple conversation starters (“Can I play?”), and help them spot peers with shared interests. Praise their effort, not just the outcome, like saying “I loved how you said hi to someone new.”
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Approach the idea of starting middle school with curiosity and give your child space to be curious and ask questions, too. It’s natural for them to feel scared and worried; make sure to validate those feelings.
Touring the facilities goes a long way to help the experience feel less like one big question mark.
Practice things like using their combination lock or getting their things organized, walking to the bus stop, etc.
Make prep fun! Give them space for creativity when it comes to shopping for school supplies, get them excited about decorating their locker, and so on.
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These situations are delicate, so the most important thing is to foster and keep open communication so your child will tell you about any issues that arise. Role-play responses, and stay connected with teachers or counselors so you can address concerns quickly and collaboratively.
✏️ Learning & motivation
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First, explore if there are focus or processing challenges at play; approach with curiosity, not judgment. Try to avoid assuming that they are choosing not to pay attention.
At home, provide a distraction-free work area, and use short work sessions with breaks. Recognize their progress and more importantly: the effort, too.
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Make it fun and interest-based! Let them choose topics they love and read together for 15–20 minutes. If confidence is low, start at an easier level to build momentum, then work upward. A sense of success becomes their internal motivator.
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Build a collaborative relationship early. Share what strategies work at home, ask how you can support classroom expectations, and communicate with both the teacher and the child study team if applicable. At home, you can also practice scenarios with your child to make them comfortable with communicating their needs.
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Think about what teachers do in the classroom to encourage children to listen and respect them. These are things like: setting clear boundaries and rules, consistency, and following through.
Define what respect means in your home, set clear expectations, and stay consistent; predictability builds trust and respect.
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First, reflect and understand why you want this rule so that you can remain firm about it. Explain your “why,” set clear expectations, and most importantly stay consistent and confident in your decision. You can also use rewards that they value and let them have input on the system so it feels collaborative.
😰 Anxiety & avoidance
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School refusal often comes from anxiety, not defiance. Start with empathy: acknowledge and validate their feelings before moving to solutions with statements like, “I can see that school is hard for you”.
Break mornings into small steps (get dressed → eat breakfast → get in car → walk to door) and praise progress. Practice calming strategies at home and on the way to school: deep breathing, grounding exercises, or listening to music in the car before drop-off. Keep attendance as consistent as possible; long breaks make anxiety worse.
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First, validate and empathize with them… We know why it’s necessary to reinforce what they learned, but we can also acknowledge and validate that after a full day at school, it’s hard to motivate yourself to do homework.
Create a consistent routine around it, setting a time and providing a quiet, distraction-free space for it (no devices if possible, no toys, no noise, etc.).
Set goals and identify what motivates them; is it rewards, is it a sense of satisfaction, or is it experiencing less anxiety because their work is done? Approach with curiosity, observe and help them connect what motivates them and capitalize on it.
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Build a collaborative relationship early. Share what strategies work at home, ask how you can support classroom expectations, and communicate with both the teacher and the child study team if applicable. At home, you can also practice scenarios with your child to make them comfortable with communicating their needs.
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Think about what teachers do in the classroom to encourage children to listen and respect them. These are things like: setting clear boundaries and rules, consistency, and following through.
Define what respect means in your home, set clear expectations, and stay consistent; predictability builds trust and respect.
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First, reflect and understand why you want this rule so that you can remain firm about it. Explain your “why,” set clear expectations, and most importantly stay consistent and confident in your decision. You can also use rewards that they value and let them have input on the system so it feels collaborative.
Need more support?
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Family Values
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